I know i've been MIA for awhile. School is nearing the end and let me put it bluntly, it's hell. I need to sign up for my classes today, but I need overrides for all of them, so i'm waiting on an e-mail that i probably wont get any time soon.
I watched the first Inuyasha movie last night and i've only seen the first hour of it. I need to finish it up tonight because I promised to return it tomorrow.
My to do list:
1. Write FMA paper for HoAF (due 4/19)
2. Come up with and make project for Creative class (due 4/19)
3. Come up with and create project for Media design class (due 4/21)
4. Attempt to make something other than cofee for Production group
5.Do taxes (due 4/15) <-- done as of 4/9
6.Write a list of 25 possibilities for Creative class (due 4/7) <-- done right after posting
7.Make a resume (asap) <-- done right after posting
BTW its still me, just plain me. Nothing else has changed in my life, the only recent event that has occured was that I got into the visual language program. And of course after finding that out, i was in this strange state for 4 days saying to myself, "I don't belong in it. I don't deserve it. There are plenty of better artists than me. I suck. They don't want me. I'll ge thrown out. They'll realize it was a big mistake. I just slipped through the cracks. I was never meant to do this." Then i remember the pressure of possibly being the first one in my family to go through a 4 year university, and then my mind starts spinning again about letting everyone on both sides of the family down, and how I wish I didn't have this pressure.
I wish sometimes I could just be the slacker. I want to be the kid that isn't expected to do good. I want to be the black sheep. I want to be the one that they don't expect anything special from. Guess what family, i'm not special. I just want to be left alone. I just want to be myself. I dont want to make a huge fuss over things. Leave me alone. Let me just be myself.
So i think my rant is over now.
I watched the first Inuyasha movie last night and i've only seen the first hour of it. I need to finish it up tonight because I promised to return it tomorrow.
My to do list:
1. Write FMA paper for HoAF (due 4/19)
2. Come up with and make project for Creative class (due 4/19)
3. Come up with and create project for Media design class (due 4/21)
4. Attempt to make something other than cofee for Production group
5.
6.
7.
BTW its still me, just plain me. Nothing else has changed in my life, the only recent event that has occured was that I got into the visual language program. And of course after finding that out, i was in this strange state for 4 days saying to myself, "I don't belong in it. I don't deserve it. There are plenty of better artists than me. I suck. They don't want me. I'll ge thrown out. They'll realize it was a big mistake. I just slipped through the cracks. I was never meant to do this." Then i remember the pressure of possibly being the first one in my family to go through a 4 year university, and then my mind starts spinning again about letting everyone on both sides of the family down, and how I wish I didn't have this pressure.
I wish sometimes I could just be the slacker. I want to be the kid that isn't expected to do good. I want to be the black sheep. I want to be the one that they don't expect anything special from. Guess what family, i'm not special. I just want to be left alone. I just want to be myself. I dont want to make a huge fuss over things. Leave me alone. Let me just be myself.
So i think my rant is over now.
- Mood:
working


Comments
::hugs::